I'm not great at dating, and it's starting to bother me. At 31, I'm still not married, and that's a big deal in my culture. My mother sends me pictures of potential brides, even at 1 a.m., and it's driving me crazy.
When I was 25, I wanted to find someone, but now that I don't have a job, my friends and family think it's a bad idea. They say women will distract me from finding a job, but when I don't have a job, they use that as a reason to leave. It's a frustrating catch-22.
My mother sends me inappropriate pictures at all hours of the night, and when I ask her to stop, she says it's because people get lonely at that time. I think she means horny, but she can't say that. My father, on the other hand, never bothers me. He's disappointed in me, and he's not afraid to show it.
Growing up, I was never good at school or sports. My father would look at my report card, tell me I was worthless, and walk away. He expected a cow from my mother, which is a ridiculous comparison. I'm not an animal, and I can't produce milk.
I've disappointed my father my entire life, and now I'm in my 30s, and I'm still not married. My mother is doing everything she can to change that, even if it means sending me pictures at 1 a.m.
I left home to get away from my parents, but it's not easy. I was working from home during the pandemic, and I thought I could work from anywhere. I went to Himachal and started smoking joints instead of working. That's when I lost my job.
I was a UI designer, but I never designed anything on my own. When my company fired me, they gave me clues that I should have taken. Instead, I kept ignoring them until it was too late.
Now, I'm looking for a new job, and it's not easy. I have to serve a notice period, and my company won't let me leave that easily. They find ways to keep me there, even if it means giving me pointless tasks.
I've tried to get in shape, but it's not easy. I went to the gym and asked for a personal trainer, but it didn't work out. Personal trainers are weird, and I don't like the way they treat me. I just want to get in shape, but it's not easy.
I've tried running marathons, but it's not for me. In Bangalore, nobody takes marathons seriously, and it's frustrating. I ran a marathon to raise awareness about saving water, but I ended up drinking more water than I saved.
I'm not sure what the future holds, but I know I need to get my life together. I need to find a job, get in shape, and maybe even get married. But for now, I'm just taking it one day at a time.