I am asexual, and I have been in a relationship for two years. Being asexual means that I do not experience sexual desire or attraction. At first, I thought it was just because I had found a great guy, but I soon realized that my lack of sexual attraction went beyond him.
Being asexual has given me a different perspective on the world. I find myself observing people on the street and not feeling attracted to them. I am also very attentive to the harmonic progression of songs and am not easily swayed by sex appeal in music videos.
My relationship is not without its challenges. I sometimes feel frustrated, as if there is something missing. There are days when I wonder if my partner would be happier if he were with someone else. However, I have come to accept that this is just who I am.
Being asexual is not a new orientation; it is simply a term that has been given to a reality that has always existed. Naming things allows us to recognize and understand them better. There are advantages to being asexual, such as getting more sleep and not having to worry about taking birth control. However, there are also challenges, such as feeling left out when friends talk about their romantic escapades.
Despite being asexual, I am still capable of romance. Last Valentine's Day, my partner surprised me with a romantic dinner, complete with candles and good wine in a hotel room. However, nothing happened beyond that. I prefer going to Disneyland and waiting in line for rides.
The problem is not asexuality itself, but rather the pressure society puts on us to conform to a certain norm. We are expected to have sex and settle down, even if we are not interested in doing so. It is important to remember that everyone experiences sexuality differently, and that is okay.
Being asexual does not mean that I am not capable of love or romance. It simply means that my experience of sexuality is different from that of many others. And that is okay.